What does “being a guest at your own table” even mean?

With Thanksgiving right around the corner, people have already started making their plans.

“Holy cow honey, how are we even going to fit that many people around our table?”

“Do we HAVE to make that gross casserole your great grandmother made just because it has always been on the family Thanksgiving table?”

“Oh wow, just found out her fiancé is vegan, what are we going to make for him?”

These are samples of whirling thoughts already traveling through your mind and it’s not even November yet. It’s your house, your family, your pets, your kids, your in-laws, your traditions, etc. Can you truly relax and enjoy your time around the table and come away with some meaningful memories?

YES-of course you can!

Tips and tricks from 40-ish years of hosting Thanksgiving, well Friendsgiving Friday in my case. I know what you’re thinking;

“Yes, but you’re a chef, a caterer, it’s second nature and easy for you.”

NOPE, I still tend to worry about the good opinion of other people (GOOP) as a recovering people-pleaser.

I’ll share some things I’ve noticed that help me and others relax and enjoy:

Family potluck with a sign-up sheet with who is responsible for which dish.

Focus on that ONE THING you love and do just that:

Decorating your table?

Flowers?

Choosing the music play list?

Making the mind-blowing Apple Pie everyone loves?

Turkey you’re famous for and you want to create the main attraction?

Sharing that wine to geek out over because you have saved it for that special day?

Pushing the whole thing to Friendsgiving Friday (like me) so all the buddies can join around the table?

Pick up your entire dinner from a caterer, restaurant, or favorite chef – while still creating that one thing you love to do.

Our Turkey A-Go-Go Thanksgiving menu is available to order now. Orders close November 19 at noon, or earlier if sold out. Pickup is available November 24–26.

Maybe you look forward to this moment all year long because nothing makes you happier than spending days in the kitchen and watching people light up with joy over the entire dinner you made yourself- Cool- you go for it. I agree, it’s fun to cook for others AND I still pick up my entire Thanksgiving meal made by my team for my Friendsgiving Friday each year.

Pick a fun way for friends and family to connect:

My cousin always comes up with a mystery question to ask before a family dinner: I still, to this day, remember his question for the table: What is one thing you remember from childhood that you think impacted your life today most positively? I still remember my young teenage son answering; “Going back and forth from my Dad’s house to my Mom’s the next week, I saw different religions, politics, and lifestyles and it made me realize that one is not good or bad, right or wrong, and to keep an open mind.” One of my favorite memories came out of this innocent icebreaker.

What NOT TO DO:

“Oh, I saw a cool new recipe for ___________ (turkey, pie, bread, dressing, etc.) – this is usually the worst time to try out a new recipe and make something you have never made. Instead, pick something you can do in your sleep even thou YOU may be tired of eating it, not everyone else is, and you know you have it down to a science.

Wake up at 4 AM to start cooking the entire meal. As a caterer, I can tell you 99.9% of all we do is prepped to the point of only needing to be “finished off”, reheated, baked off, bowled up, etc. the day of.

Don’t lose the point of Thanksgiving Day and its purpose: Make being thankful for family, friends, connection, fun, laughter, fall leaves, your football team playing today, enjoying yummy food and drink. My ex-restaurant manager used to have a quote if one of our dishes didn’t meet expectations; “It’s not world peace, it’s food.”

Don’t stress over GOOP (the good opinion of other people.) You are kind enough to open your home to family and friends, just know the dog may sneak into the kitchen and snag a bite of bread left too close to the edge; your power may flicker; your one dish may get too brown and crispy, gravy may spill all over….

I could go on and on because stuff will happen, trust me, because we’re human.

This is about you, not me, and I only suggested things that I do myself:

I pick up my entire Turkey A-Go-Go for my Friendsgiving Friday each year.

I always make my sweet potato pie, because it’s Southern, and a part of my heritage and I love to make it for me and my Mexican pastry chef.

I tell my guests to bring a bottle and a story for an ice-breaker: usually a bottle of wine that has a memory behind it for them (and I don’t drink wine so that is my cleaver way of making sure people have a wine they will enjoy with dinner.) I love zero-proof, so my story needs to be creative around my bottle choice.

I am not the music buff but one of my guests is and she always asks to hop on my system and pick the playlist. YES PLEASE.

Go with the flow and enjoy your Thanksgiving this year.

If you made it this far, I’m thankful for your patience.

Turkey A-Go-Go is now open until November 19th until noon, or unless it sells our earlier. Pickup November 24th – 26th